More Than Half Way There

This past weekend I was in Davenport, Iowa to visit my 82-year-old Dad. He just returned home after a 5-month stay at the Kahl Home, a wonderful nursing home operated by the Carmelite Sisters. Dad was recovering from breaking his hip last June. I'm not convinced that his coming home is a good idea because I don't believe my petite 76-year old step-mother can adequately care for him. But he told me that at home he has a reason to live. In the nursing one just sits there waiting to die.

It's hard for many people to think about growing older and approaching the end of earthly life. My step-mother tries to ignore her birthday each year (but she doesn't want the rest of us to!) A wise nun once commented, "I know that I've already lived most of my life." She was about 60, and realized it was unlikely that she would live to 120. I myself am past the half-century mark, and for me each birthday celebration means that I'm just another year closer to heaven! That's not morbid...it's the hope that gives life to our faith.

Two really good books come to mind for me. One is Grounded in God: A Mature Experience of Faith by Jim Cavera and Ann Cavera (Liguori Publications). In this book the Caveras reflect on the days when their kids were growing up. They also talk about visiting their grandkids today and feel a sense of satisfaction that their own lives are no longer so hectic.

Here is what the Caveras say in their book:

It is by learning to "be" rather than to always "do" and by welcoming what grace brings into our lives that we are able to see how God, at every moment, is making all things new.

I think that comes with maturity. I look around at others who are younger than I and who always seem to be "on the go." Since I have recently bought a house that is requiring more work than I anticipated, I sometimes wonder if I will ever again be able to have a nice quiet evening or a whole weekend for relaxing.

In the new house there is a sunroom that I intend to use as my personal reading room. One evening after I finished painting it, I sat there with a new book in hand. It was after midnight, but I didn't want to go to bed because it was so wonderful sitting there alone, in the quiet night, with a good book.

The other book is brand new - - hot off the press. The Spiritual Challenge of Midlife: Crisis and Opportunity by Anselm Grun, OSB. (Liguori Publications) Grun is a Benedictine monk living in Germany. As a monk he has a lot of time to reflect on what really matters in life.

He is also a very well-learned man. In this book he combines the reflections of a medieval mystic (Johannes Tauler) with an understanding of human nature as taught by modern psychologist, Carl Jung. No small accomplishment!

The author explains that Tauler often spoke about the fortieth year of life because he believed that only after that do our spiritual efforts begin to bear fruit. He equated the first 40 years of life to the 40 days between Christ's resurrection and his Ascension to heaven. He quotes Tauler:

Until a man has reached his fortieth year, he will never attain lasting peace, never be truly formed into God, try as he may. Up to that time he is occupied by so many things, driven this way and that by his own natural impulses; he is governed by them although he may imagine that he is governed by God. Before the proper time has arrived, he cannot achieve true and perfect peace, nor can he enter into a God-seeing life.

So while many may approach their senior years with fear and view it as a time of decline, Grun considers those "golden years" to be a period of ascent. Midlife and beyond is not the encroachment of weakness, but rather a juncture during which God offers people a new and more authentic way of living.

I expected this book to be rather heavy in theological and psychological jargon, but it is surprisingly easy to read.