Babies

Just before Christmas our family received a new addition...my niece had her first baby, a girl named Ashlynn Mae. To me all babies have always looked alike and I have never thought they were particularly cute like most people do. But forgive me, this one is adorable. I got to hold her for the first time on Christmas - she was only 2 weeks old. I had so much fun shopping for her. I had bought Christmas gifts for her even before she was born!

Now she is four months old and her mother sent me the picture above. The pink poodle with her is one of my Christmas presents. My niece says she adores it. Of course. It was hand-picked by me. Why wouldn't she love it???

Children are the future and they are our responsibility to raise them to become productive members of society. To impart appropriate values to them for the next generation and for the good of society. Wow, that's a MAJOR responsibility. And it's a responsibility for all of us, not just the particular set of parents who have a child. Perhaps one of the best ways we can do that is by supporting the parents.

Here are a couple of books that I have gotten for my niece and her husband to help them understand their little daughter and how she will grow up. Ages, Stages, and Phases (Liguori Publications) talks about child development from birth through adolescence. It helps parents integrate the physical, social, moral, emotional, intellectual and spiritual development of their kids. The author, Dr. Pat Fosarelli, teaches pediatrics at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, and she teaches spirituality at the Ecumenical Institute of Theology at St. Mary's Seminary. So she does know what she's talking about!

Another book I gave my niece and her husband when I first heard they were expecting is a delightfullly illustrated book by popular author, Kathleen Finley. It is titled: Welcome! Prayers for New and Pregnant Parents (also Liguori Publications). It includes prayers for all sorts of routine daily activities that aren't always so fun. Like a prayer while changing diapers, a prayer when the baby is fussy, a prayer while feeding the baby during the night. There are also blessing prayers for the baby's crib and thanksgiving prayers for a healthy delivery, among many other prayers.

Continuing the Journey Wherever It Takes Us

I just received a very touching phone call from a sweet little lady in California. She explained to me that she was a Catholic as a child but faded away from the Church for a long time. Now, at age 84, she has returned and is trying to do her best to get back into the swing of things.

She had been given a copy of Handbook for Today's Catholic, (Liguori Publications) and had a question about something she read in it. This particular book is an all time bestseller for Liguori. Revised and updated about four or five times, it has sold over 5 million copies in the last thirty years.

Through the years I have heard the stories of a lot of folks who have "fallen away" from the Church for one reason or another. I have to confess, I have been a "cradle Catholic" all my life and never experienced a period when I did not go to Church regularly. Even as a teenager (which is when many start to fall away) I played the organ at Sunday Mass and Tuesday devotions to Our Mother Perpetual Help in my hometown parish. That probably gave me something to do at Church so I never got bored there, as many people claim is the problem.

Liguori Publications has quite a number of books, videos, pamphlets and leaflets on the subject of Catholics who have fallen away from the Church and later want to return. One in particular is a new one by author Sally Mews: Catholics Continuing the Journey. The great thing about this book is that not only is it useful for "returning" Catholics, but it makes a great study guide for small groups of parishioners who always have been active in the Church. Here is an excerpt from its preface:

Is the status of our relationship with God determined by loving choices or obedience to laws or by both?

Many people do not want to love because love is hard work, time consuming, frequently frustrating, never absolutely certain, and requires involvement of the heart and surrender of deepest emotions.

And then Jesus comes along and says to us: "By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another" (John 13:35).

...It may well be that the only thing that Jesus will ask us after our death will be the question he asked Peter: "Do you love me?" And if the answer truthfully is yes, the doors of heaven will swing open.

Now that's an attractive brand of religion!

What Do We Believe About Each Other?

Unfortunately, so much of the political turmoil in the world today revolves around religious differences. I remember the theme song from a movie that was produced back in the 1970s or 80s: Billy Jack. One of the protagonists in the movie was a strong-willed woman named Jeanne. She would remind you a little of the role Barbara Stanwyck frequently played in westerns - righteous and stalwart. She reminded me a great deal of my 8th grade teacher whose name was Sister Mary Jeanne.

Anyway, a phrase in the theme song went like this:
Go ahead and hate your neighbor;
go ahead and cheat a friend.
Do in the name of heaven,
you can justify it in the end.

There's a new book out by popular writer Sister Joan Chittister, called In Search of Belief. The catalog copy for this book states, "we live in a world where religion has become a tool people can use to their advantage rather than a means of growing closer to God."

The elections here in the U.S. this past week seemed to be a struggle between the Christian right and everyone else. People are suspicious of Muslims, and Jews, and liberal Christians, and humanitarians.

I recently attended a memorial service for a young Jewish man that was held in a Christian church with two women ministers and a woman rabbi all playing parts in the service. The rabbi spoke profoundly when she said, "This shows that there is much more we have in common as a believing people than we have that divides us."

Liguori Publications has published a series of small pamphlets titled What Catholics Should Know About... . These tracts could be useful to a member of any other religion as well. Among the newest titles in this series are WCSKA Mormons, WCSKA Judaism, WCSKA Islam, and WCSKA Evangelicals. Each of these pamphlets was written by Father Vincent Heier who is an expert in ecumenical relations. He a priest in the Archdiocese of St. Louis.

I just seems to me that knowledge about each other will take away the fears people have of each other. Only then can we begin to live side-by-side in peace with respect and even reverence for each other's beliefs and traditions.

More Than Half Way There

This past weekend I was in Davenport, Iowa to visit my 82-year-old Dad. He just returned home after a 5-month stay at the Kahl Home, a wonderful nursing home operated by the Carmelite Sisters. Dad was recovering from breaking his hip last June. I'm not convinced that his coming home is a good idea because I don't believe my petite 76-year old step-mother can adequately care for him. But he told me that at home he has a reason to live. In the nursing one just sits there waiting to die.

It's hard for many people to think about growing older and approaching the end of earthly life. My step-mother tries to ignore her birthday each year (but she doesn't want the rest of us to!) A wise nun once commented, "I know that I've already lived most of my life." She was about 60, and realized it was unlikely that she would live to 120. I myself am past the half-century mark, and for me each birthday celebration means that I'm just another year closer to heaven! That's not morbid...it's the hope that gives life to our faith.

Two really good books come to mind for me. One is Grounded in God: A Mature Experience of Faith by Jim Cavera and Ann Cavera (Liguori Publications). In this book the Caveras reflect on the days when their kids were growing up. They also talk about visiting their grandkids today and feel a sense of satisfaction that their own lives are no longer so hectic.

Here is what the Caveras say in their book:

It is by learning to "be" rather than to always "do" and by welcoming what grace brings into our lives that we are able to see how God, at every moment, is making all things new.

I think that comes with maturity. I look around at others who are younger than I and who always seem to be "on the go." Since I have recently bought a house that is requiring more work than I anticipated, I sometimes wonder if I will ever again be able to have a nice quiet evening or a whole weekend for relaxing.

In the new house there is a sunroom that I intend to use as my personal reading room. One evening after I finished painting it, I sat there with a new book in hand. It was after midnight, but I didn't want to go to bed because it was so wonderful sitting there alone, in the quiet night, with a good book.

The other book is brand new - - hot off the press. The Spiritual Challenge of Midlife: Crisis and Opportunity by Anselm Grun, OSB. (Liguori Publications) Grun is a Benedictine monk living in Germany. As a monk he has a lot of time to reflect on what really matters in life.

He is also a very well-learned man. In this book he combines the reflections of a medieval mystic (Johannes Tauler) with an understanding of human nature as taught by modern psychologist, Carl Jung. No small accomplishment!

The author explains that Tauler often spoke about the fortieth year of life because he believed that only after that do our spiritual efforts begin to bear fruit. He equated the first 40 years of life to the 40 days between Christ's resurrection and his Ascension to heaven. He quotes Tauler:

Until a man has reached his fortieth year, he will never attain lasting peace, never be truly formed into God, try as he may. Up to that time he is occupied by so many things, driven this way and that by his own natural impulses; he is governed by them although he may imagine that he is governed by God. Before the proper time has arrived, he cannot achieve true and perfect peace, nor can he enter into a God-seeing life.

So while many may approach their senior years with fear and view it as a time of decline, Grun considers those "golden years" to be a period of ascent. Midlife and beyond is not the encroachment of weakness, but rather a juncture during which God offers people a new and more authentic way of living.

I expected this book to be rather heavy in theological and psychological jargon, but it is surprisingly easy to read.

The Stuff of Life & Death

They say "when it rains, it pours." That has been true in my life these last several weeks and months. At the end of March my apartment building was sold and I was given a 30-day notice by the new owner to vacate my unit. (He wanted to live there!) I had to find a place to move by May 1.

A fellow employee had unexpectedly resigned in March and I was asked to temporarily assume some of her duties. It meant that I was out of town much of April (when I needed to be looking for a place to live...). In fact, I was in town only 8 days the entire month. A dear friend with whom I work and carpool graciously invited me to stay temporarily at his home until I could find a place of my own. I've been there since April 29.

I did sign on the dotted line for a home the end of May, but then the building inspection turned up some rather serious problems that I did not want to deal with, so we walked away from that contract. Just a week later I found another house - less expensive and in a better neighborhood. The inspection on this one went fine and if all goes well, I'll move in on or around the 4th of July. I can't wait (neither can my carpool buddy!).

In the midst of all that, my Dad fell at home and broke his right hip (he broke his left one 2 years ago). As soon as I learned of his injury I sped home to Iowa (280 miles away) to be there when he came out of surgery. Spent a long 5-day weekend at his side. Later in the week he was transferred to a local nursing home to begin rehabilitation therapy. That weekend was Father's Day, so I made the 4-1/2 hour trek again. Dad is depressed and wants to go home. He has tried to get out of the bed, even though he cannot walk yet.

Dad will be 82 in August. He has lived a very full life. But now his sight and hearing are both failing. He has struggled against Parkinson's disease for about 10 years. He has a distended bladder and so he must wear a urinary catheter at all times. After his first broken hip, the doctor told him if it ever happened again he might never walk the rest of his life. Surely his "quality of life" could be rated poor.

I love Dad and have grown quite close to him since my mother died nearly 20 years ago. But I often think about how in heaven, not only will he be able to walk again, he'll be able to fly! Also, he'll be with his own parents, whom he loved dearly. And I can't imagine how he could possibly be happier than he will be there with Mom.

A new booklet titled, Making Health Care Decisions: A Catholic Guide to End-of-Life Care by Father Richard C. Sparks describes the Church's position on all of this.

"Illness, aging, and finally death-of-the-body are a natural part of the life cycle for us all...Death is the inevitable and natural last stage of earthly life, opening us up to the fullness of eternal life.

...to "respect life" means to make decisions that enhance our lives as a whole. Throughout most of our lives, the obvious medical decision is to "forge ahead" - take your medicine, undergo the surgery, do the prescribed treatment that will save your life and enhance your health. But at some point, forestalling the inevitable onset of dying may be futile, wasteful, torturous, and morally wrong."

This pastorally sensitive booklet is taken from a larger book by nearly the same name Making Health Care Decisions: A Catholic Guide (Liguori Publications). The larger edition is edited by Ron Hamel.

There are three other booklets on topics from the larger edition as well: A Catholic Guide to Advance Health Care Directives, by Redemptorist priest, Mark Miller; A Catholic Guide to Medically Administered Nutrition & Hydration; by Michael R. Panicola, and A Catholic Guide: Introduction, also by the editor, Ron Hamel.

Liguori Publications is also a participant in a video series on health care ethics. This video series was prepared in part by the faculty of the Center for Health Care Ethics at St. Louis University.

In today's world of rapidly changing medical technology it is seldom easy to know what to do in some very important circumstances. Usually there is pressure and emotion surrounding those decisions. Thankfully these authors have helped us sort through what the Church teaches so we can make such life and death decisions with proper guidance.

On the Road a Lot

I've been away from my computer a lot, traveling for business purposes. Our publishing company staffs booths at several national conventions where we try to sell our books and catechetical materials. In early April, I was in Annaheim, CA. Last week Atlanta, GA, and next week Chicago, IL. The member of our department who is in charge of these conventions retired unexpectedly and I have been asked to fill in for her.

Between all those trips I have attended two 2-day workshops, one in St. Louis and the other in Chicago. I have been in my office a total of only 8 days the entire month of April. I can't tell you how wonderful it is to get back into my own bed after so many days in strange ones.

I usually don't get into personal daily life in this blog, but on top of all the above, my apartment building has been sold. When the previous owner put it on the market I decided to begin looking for a house to buy. I love the apartment - it is right across from the Missouri Botanical Garden. My second floor balcony overlooks the garden. But I've been there three years, and I had no idea how much a new owner might want to raise the rent.

Instead, the new owner gave me a 30-day notice to vacate!

I had not been expecting that. Apparently, his loan requires him to occupy the building, and because of lease restrictions, I was the easiest person to get rid of. I have until May 1. Since I'm leaving April 30 for Chicago, it leaves me only tomorrow to move. Fortunately, I had already begun the process of working with a realtor, and so I will be staying for a few weeks with a friend, just until I can find a place I like.

Another fortunate thing is that I do like to travel...especially if it's to a place I've never been before. Perhaps I'm an explorer at heart. And sometimes I will walk and walk and walk until my legs can go no further just so I can see as much as possible.

I've had the great privilege of visiting Europe twice (I loved Germany!), Australia for a whole month, and even South Africa - which was probably a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

On all these trips I did not have the travel guides that Liguori publishes available to me, but they would have been a great help. Several were written by Kevin J. Wright. These two I have pictured talk about lots of different places to stay and even restaurants to visits. Some of the travel guides lead pilgrims to specific shrines in Eastern & Central Europe, Western Europe, and the United States.

I still have three places I really want to visit sometime in my life: Hawaii, Greece, and the Galapagos Islands. I don't know why, but I've always had a fascination with Greece. And since I was a biology teacher before I "evolved" into other kinds of work, I really want to see that marvelous place where Charles Darwin got his inspiration for the theory of natural selection. To get there you have to go to Quito in Ecuador. That would cover South America for me. I still need to find a place and reason to visit Asia - then I will have set foot on all the continents of the world. (And no, I'm not going to try for Antartica!)

More On Immigration

The immigration debate continues in Congress, in the media, in cities across the country, and among citizens. I recently came upon a piece written by a priest for St. Patrick's Day. Here is part of what he said:

"I can remember the excitement of my parents the night that John Fitzgerald Kennedy was elected president of the United States in 1960. I was a ten-year-old who really didn't understand the cause of their delight. They were so happy because he was a Catholic, and both of them could remember the terrible bigotry that Al Smith, a Catholic, faced in the presidential elections of 1928. Equally important, if not even more significant, was the fact that the handsome Senator from Massachusetts was of Irish descent. Both my parents were born in Ireland and had immigrated to America as young adults."

"The story of America, be you Irish, Italian, Puerto Rican, Dominican, Vietnamese, or any other nationality, is one of immigration. Almost all of us can trace our heritages to other lands. Many who landed here were escaping poverty, persecution, and only hoped to provide a better life for their families. We are a nation of immigrants."

"I often walk a path where I live in Brooklyn. It is called Shore Road and is right at the Narrows where ships come into New York and first glimpse the Statue of Liberty. Someone has scrawled graffiti on the ground that reads 'Stop all immigration now.' Those are some of the saddest words I have ever read. It is at the very place where my parents and millions of others sailed into New York and saw Lady Liberty in the Harbor. Today, I am proud to be Irish...and I am especially proud to know that I am the son of immigrants."

I can readily resonate with this reflection. Although I am 4th generation in this country, my entire family (both my Mom's and my Dad's sides) came over from Germany in the mid-1800s. My brother is adopted and is French-Canadian. The Irish, the Polish, Jewish people, and all kinds of other folks have experienced terrible discrimination against them here in "the land of the free." Now Hispanics are facing similar a plight.

Liguori Publications, where I work, is trying hard to respond to the needs of our sisters and brothers from south of the border who come here seeking what they cannot find at home. We have a whole line of products in Spanish to aid those who need our help. The traditions of these people are deeply rooted in their culture. They bring a cohesive sense of "family" that is sadly being lost among many Anglo-Americans.

Just as the Greeks, the Italians, the Africans, the French, and so many others have brought a wonderful richness into our lives as Americans, so will our Latino neighbors add a lot to what makes America the colorful and prosperous land that it is. We should welcome them with open arms.